Even though we know it’s not true, how many times do we unintentionally place God in that position?
I’ve found that lately I seem to be putting Him there a lot. I know that’s not His nature, yet in the back of my mind, I fear that He’s just waiting to rip all the good out from under me.
I was told once that when we fear giving God our all means giving up something in our life we care a lot about, it’s God’s way of telling us it shouldn’t be in our lives.
Personally, I disagree.
You see, I’ve always been one of those people who’s life reflected the idea that ‘if it can go wrong, it will go wrong’. Being happy only meant everything would com crashing down moments later. That happiness was just the set up for disaster, heartbreak, destruction and loneliness. After it’s happened so many times, that kind of thing just starts to stick with you.
Even though you know God isn’t the one making all the bad happen (as much of it is ‘just life’, and other parts based on your own poor decisions), you can’t help but feel like God is still ultimately responsible.
I posted not too long ago on the struggles of giving God my all, and I realized recently that the biggest thing holding me back is this idea that God is the mean kid with a magnifying glass.
I’m terrified that if I give God everything, He will immediately strip away the best thing that has happened in my life in years. That giving it to Him means giving up being happy.
But that’s not God. God doesn’t take things away just to make you unhappy. Unless it’s causing you to falter, causing you to run in the other direction, it doesn’t mean that living for God means losing everything else.
So why do we have this fear that God really is about to strip everything away?
That, I wish I had the answer to.